6/4 AEW DYNAMITE TV RESULTS: Keller’s report on Andrade’s debut with Vickie Guerrero, Miro’s shout-out to his wife, Bucks vs. Pac & Penta, Dustin vs. Comoroto in bullrope match main event

KELLER’S AEW DYNAMITE REPORT
JUNE 4, 2021
JACKSONVILLE, FLA. AT DAILY’S PLACE
AIRED LIVE ON TNT

Note: This aired on Friday at 10 ET, a special day and time.

Commentators: Jim Ross, Tony Schiavone, Excalibur

Ring Announcer: Justin Roberts

[HOUR ONE]

-The Dynamite opening montage aired with quick glimpses of Mark Henry, Big Show, and Christian along with other regulars.

-The announcers introduced the show as ring entrances began for Pac and Penta. They aired a clip of what The Young Bucks did to Jon Moxley at Double or Nothing. Ross said it made him want to throw up and it’s taken Moxley out of action.

Excalibur said the Bucks attacked Rey Fenix in the back earlier, and Brandon Cutler filmed it, but they won’t air it. He said they do what they want with it, such as air it on BTE (“Being the Elite,” the Bucks’ YouTube show.)

(1) THE YOUNG BUCKS (Matt & Nick Jackson) vs. PAC & PENTA

The Bucks gave Michael Nakazawa a headband at ringside, and he freaked out like a super-fan. Frankie Kazarian attacked Nakazawa. Schiavone said he loves it and that’s Kaz’s new role. Karl Anderson and Doc Gallows chased Kaz to the back. Pac and Penta flip dove onto the Bucks at ringside before the bell. As the two teams brawled at ringside, Don Callis joined in on commentary.

When Ross called Callis a liar, Callis warned him that was slander. Pac hid behind Cutler at ringside when Pac was pursuing him. Callis said everyone needs a “young boy around.” Nick blindsided Pac with a kick from the ring apron. Matt showboated in the ring as fans booed. Matt ran around ringside and charged at Pac with a clothesline as Nick held him. He did it in a way that mocked that move. Cutler sprayed his back with cold spray. Then he shined Matt’s boot a Pac recovered in the ring. Pac nailed Matt with a hard clothesline as soon as he turned around. Nick flip dove onto Penta at ringside, but Pac kicked Nick off the ring apron. Matt speared Pac and punched away at his forehead. Excalibur hyped that Kenny Omega had something to say later and they planned to “blow the lid off something.”

A minute later Pac suplexed Nick onto the back of his head and neck. Nasty looking. Pac tagged Penta in, and he went after the Jacksons with consecutive sling blades. As Penta showboated for the hard camera, Nick recovered. Penta came right back with a back stabber. Nick broke up a Penta cover on Matt. Penta tagged Pac back in at 8:00. Chaos broke out with all four battling for a couple minutes. Penta gave Matt a package pieldriver while Nick gave Pac a back suplex onto the edge of the ring apron at the same time.

Matt and Pac were down at ringside. Penta and Nick squared off mid-ring. Nick pulled the ref in front of him. The ref went down when Penta caught him in the eye. Nick yanked off Penta’s mask, but Penta had second mask underneath. Penta kicked Nick low and then gave him a Fear Factor package piledriver. He tagged in Pac who landed his Black Arrow for a near fall broken up by Matt. Cutler hit Pac in the legs with a camera as he stood on the top rope. Nick then used a deep stack pin on Pac for the three count.

WINNERS: The Young Bucks in 12:00.

-Afterward, the Bucks set up the stereo kicks on Penta that they used against Moxley on Sunday. Eddie Kingston ran out for the save before they could connect. The Bucks bailed out to ringside where Cutler sprayed their backs with the cold spray. Callis said Kingston scares him to death. The Bucks and Cutler retreated to the back.

(Keller’s Analysis: Dazzling action with the Bucks’ heel personas having a chance to shine.)

-Excalibur hyped other matches and segments coming up on the show. Ross plugged that Mark Henry would be speaking next. He said it’ll be a hell of a night. [c]

-Tony Schiavone, looking more dapper than his usual appearance, introduced Mark Henry. As Henry came out, Ross said he signed him to his first pro wrestling contract in the mid-’90s after seeing him dunk a basketball at the NBA All-Star Game.

Henry said he’s not there to fix AEW because AEW isn’t broken, but he’s there to turn the screws. Schiavone asked if he’s going to get back in the ring again. Fans stood and cheered. Ross said he’s lost weight and looks great. Henry said he’s not going to say yes, but he does have a lot left in the tank.

Vickie Guerrero marched out with a screechy “Excuse me!” Ross said his glasses just shattered and he can’t drive home now. She tried to talk, but fans booed her. She screeched and introduced Andrade. He walked out looked super-dapper as Excalibur went nuts. They showed fans reacting with shock as Excalibur ran down his credentials. Ross said he’s a “big-time in-ring product, no doubt about it.” An “AEW!” chant started. Ross said apparently Vickie has made herself a deal.

Andrade said he is the face of Latinos, but today he is saying he will be the new face of All Elite Wrestling. Fans cheered. Vickie smiled and applauded behind him. Excalibur and Vickie left arm-in-arm. Excalibur said he’s a threat to every title in AEW.

(Keller’s Analysis: He carried himself like a big star. I wish Guerrero didn’t do her tired screeching “excuse me” bit leftover from WWE, but instead used her considerable talent to bring some more gravitas to his introduction.) [c]

(2) CODY RHODES & LEE JOHNSON (w/Arn Anderson) vs. ANTHONY OGOGO & Q.T. MARSHALL

Cody came out in a custom Cody Pride t-shirt, with all proceeds going to the National Center for Transgender Equality charity. Ross angrily asked, “What does Q.T. stand for? Does anyone know?” The announcers said Cody had to wrestle a perfect match last Sunday to beat Ogogo. Marshall wrestled the opening minutes. Ogogo kicked Johnson in the chest at ringside. As Ogogo tagged in, they cut to a split-screen break. [c/ss]

Ogogo rammed Johnson’s face into the turnbuckle and then stomped away at him in the corner. A minute later he tagged Marshall back in. Cody hot-tagged in after the break and went at Marshall. Cody went after Ogogo with a Disaster Kick on the ring apron, although it showed some light before Ogogo bumped to the floor. Cody applied a figure-four mid-ring. Ogogo frog splashed Cody to break the move, but then rolled to the floor selling his ribs. Excalibur said Ogogo said he suffered the rib injury overtraining. Both Cody and Marshall were slow to get up.

Marshall gave Cody a Diamond Cutter for a near fall. Cody kicked out as Johnson was late with the break-up. Aaron Solow ran to ringside and distracted the ref as Ogogo delivered a KO punch to Cody as he was setting up a move. Marshall scored the three count as Ogogo stood and watched a foot away. Excalibur called it a shocking victory.

WINNER: Marshall & Ogogo in 8:00.

(Keller’s Analysis: So AEW is getting on board with DISTRACTION finishes. Yipee. Also, I’m sorry, but Q.T. Marshall still comes across as someone who never gets on a national wrestling TV show if he’s not in tight with people in power.)

-Ogogo yelled at Schiavone after the match, saying he’s speechless because he never believed in him. He said he just shocked the world. Solow congratulated Ogogo and Marshall at ringside. Ross said they’ll never hear the end of this.

-They went to the announcers at ringside. Excalibur talked about Inner Circle winning Stadium Stampede. They aired highlights.

-Chris Jericho led the rest of Inner Circle to the ring – Sammy Guevara, Santana, Ortiz, and Jake Hager. The crowd sang Jericho song to the conclusion as Jericho looked on with a smile. He introduced themselves as the Le Champions of Stadium Stampede II. He told everyone to look under their chairs for a free Stadium Stampede t-shirt. Fans pulled them out and held them up. “How cool is that?” asked Ross. He said he’s loving the fans back.

Jericho said the hero of Stadium Stampede is Guevara. He smiled as fans chanted “Sammy! Sammy!” He said he used to do the 630 off the roof in their backyard. He said doing that at Double or Nothing to close out the show and keeping his brothers together made for a night he’ll never forget. He said he loves them all.

Santana said it was the greatest moment in their lives and careers. He asked what they truly accomplished other than keeping themselves together, because they still have to pass them backstage and listen to them brag. He said the true accomplishment will be them lying in a ditch somewhere on Highway 5. “But that’s just me,” he said. He said FTR tried to enter their career by piledriving them through those tables. He said the Inner Circle-Pinnacle shit is far from over.

Hager said they don’t get to say when it’s over. He told Wardlow he hopes he’s listening. He said he beat him in AEW ring, so he dares him to fight him in the one place he has never been beaten – an MMA cage fight. He told him to face him in two weeks on Dynamite and man up.

Jericho said when he thinks of Shawn Spears, it pisses him off. He said when he thinks of Wardlow powerbombing him off the stage and putting him out of action for a month, it pisses him off. When he thinks of the prick MJF, it pisses him off.

He said MJF tied to end his career and possibly even his life when he pushed him off the cage at Blood & Guts, and he’s never been the same since. He said he thinks about it every single day. He said he wakes up in a cold sweat thinking about how it was almost lights out for him that night. He said he realizes he must settle the score.

He said he knows they embarrassed him with the Bubbly Bath, and he beat the hell out of him at Stadium Stampede, but it isn’t enough. “Until I can ruin your career and your life the way you tried to ruin mine, this will never be over,” he said. “Do you understand me?”

He said MJF calls him the GOAT. He said if he’s as good as he thinks he is, he will beat MJF. He repeated it. He said the Inner Circle never forgives and never forgets. He slammed the mic down with a red-faced intensity.

-Trent, Chuck Taylor, and Orange Cassidy responded in the locker room to the outcome fo the AEW World Title match. Chuck called Callis a “useless conman.” Trent said a bad guy cheated and won. A dead serious Cassidy said, “If you think this is over, it’s not.”

-They went backstage to Omega and Callis critiquing the color mix on the screen showing footage of his win on Sunday. Alex Marvez walked in and said the Best Friends are accusing them of cheating. Callis said it’s a false narrative and a con job because nobody can beat him. He said they have raw footage and will blow up the conspiracy that is trying to take the AEW Title away from Omega. Marvez brought up Jungle Boy winning the Casino Battle Royal to earn a title match against him. Omega laughed and asked how many in that match were in the top five. Omega said he loves Jungle Boy’s music, but it takes something to be a Jungle Man instead of a Boy. He began singing Jungle Boy’s music.

[HOUR TWO]

(3) JUNGLE BOY & CHRISTIAN CAGE vs. PRIVATE PARTY (Isiah Kassidy & Marq Quen w/Matt Hardy)

JB came out to his theme song first. The screen noted his 8-1 record in 2021. The response seemed polite, but not huge. Christian came out second. The announcers talked about Christian being the favorite to win and he lasted from the start to nearly the end. Ross said the right man won. Private Party are now wearing designer shoes, pants, belts, and white dress shirts as they wrestle. Ross said they’re too special to wear regular athletic gear now. Excalibur plugged the Saturday, June 26 event at Daily’s Place featuring Omega defending against Jungle Boy. Ross lamented saying “Casino Battle Royale” instead of “Casino Battle Royal.” Schiavone said it’s okay.

When Hardy distracted the ref, Private Party double-teamed Christian by snapping his neck over the top rope. They cut to a split-screen break. [c/ss]

Private Party dominated Christian during the break. They struck some Christian-like poses to mock him as he was face down on the mat. A minute later they lifted Christian and held him for poses. Christian dropped them both. Ross said if you screw around like that in your bar clothes, it’ll backfire. Jungle Boy got the hot-tag. He took it to both Quen and Kassidy. When JB landed a brain buster on Quen, Ross said Dick Murdoch never looked like Jungle Boy. Kassidy broke up a submission hold. Christian entered and nocked him to the floor. He missed on a dive to the floor, though. Kassidy gave JB a thumb to the eye and then Quen scored a near fall with a yank of the tights.

Christian broke up a Gin & Juice double-team on JB. JB dropped Kassidy on the top of his head on a Styles Clash type of dive off the ropes. He then applied the Snare Trap for the tapout. Kassidy appeared to be okay.

WINNER: JB & Christian.

-After the match, Matt Hardy gave Christian a Twist of Fate on the ramp, then ran “like a scalded dog,” as Ross put it.

(Keller’s Analysis: There was something missing energy-wise in this match. JB seemed maybe freaked out by the botched move off the ropes near the end, but he didn’t seem all there even during ring entrances. It was just a weird vibe from him throughout. Christian seemed to give him a bit of a pep talk as JB celebrated in the ring. This wasn’t the red-hot follow-up you’d want after a big PPV win to build to his AEW Title match on Dynamite later this month.)

-As clips aired from Double or Nothing, Taz told Hangman Page to pick a partner to face Powerhouse Hobbs & Brian Cage next week on Dynamite. He said Hangman screwed around with the wrong club. Ricky Starks and Taz’s son were standing there with Hobbs, Cage, and Taz too.

(Keller’s Analysis: Good, straight-forward intense Taz promo. No indication or acknowledgement of any dissension with Cage and the rest.)

-Schiavone introduced Sting, who came out with Darby. Excalibur said it was an honor to call Sting’s return match. Sting wore a t-shirt with half his face, half Darby’s face, that is likely to sell a lot. Sting said he has had so many incredible experiences in wrestling, but last Sunday will be a night he will never, ever forget. He said Double or Nothing stands up to anything he has ever done in this business. Fans chanted, “You still got it!” Sting thanked the fans for the chant.

Scorpio Sky and Ethan Page interrupted on the big screen. He said Sting was incredible. He said he knows why they call him the Icon now. He said he even smelled good. He said he was so good, he dragged Darby over the finish line. Ethan told Darby that Sting is carrying him and he’s just a “spineless co-dependent bitch.” Sky told him to go find someone other than Sting and prove them wrong. Darby took the mic, but they awkwardly cut away from him to plug Britt Baker’s celebration. He seemed unsure of what to say.

(Keller’s Analysis: Haven’t we agreed to stop saying “bitch” in promos? My god it’s so overdone and has no bite left. It’s just desperate and lame sounding. Darby just standing there with the mic in hand as they cut away was one of the worst brief moments of his time in AEW. It’s like he was about to talk but what he had to say wasn’t worth staying with so they cut away.) [c]

-Schiavone stood mid-ring for the Dr. Britt Baker celebration. There was a platter of fast food burgers and a gathering of wrestlers including Ryan Nemeth, Vickie Guerrero, Nyla Rose, Peter Avalon, Chaos Project, Jack Evans, Angelico. Baker then walked out to the ring as her music played. She was joined by Rebel.

She entered the ring and said the fans have already been gifted, but she’s going to outdo Jericho. She said taped under everyone’s seats are burger coupons. “What is this, Oprah?” Ross said. She then said, “Wait, they’re all right here with me where they belong.” She pointed at the platter of burgers. She said she did all the work. She said when she’s on the TV screen, viewers are locked on her every move. Nyla Rose was rolling her eyes throughout. She talked about taking the AEW Women’s Division to a new level.

Baker invited two people to join her for a bite to eat. She said Schiavone and Rebel are worthy. Rose knocked them out of their hands. She tossed the platter out of the ring and into the front row of fans. Excalibur said she was spoiling Baker’s celebration. Rose began popping balloons with her nails.

(Keller’s Analysis: That was just too slapstick and corny. The cast of prelim wrestlers in the background hamming it up didn’t help. Plus, I’m not sure who is worthy of rooting for.)

-Backstage Pac and Penta interrupted an Eddie Kingston interview. Pac told him they don’t need his help, so stay out of their business. Kingston said the enemy of his enemy is his friend, and he told them to let that marinate in their brains.

(Keller’s Analysis: Pac sold Kingston’s comments in a way that took away from his serious persona.)

-Excalibur and Ross were shown at the announce desk reflecting on Andrade’s arrival and the Baker-Rose angle.

(4) THE BUNNY (w/The Blade) vs. RED VELVET (w/KiLynn King, Big Swole)

They aired a clip from AEW Dark (a rare snippet of that show on Dynamite) to build up this match. Bunny just hammed it up in a corny way during ring entrances and in the ring when the match began. It’s like she’s doing GLOW wrestling with her body language and facial expressions, almost mocking pro wrestling. She charged at Velvet at the bell, but Velvet moved and she crashed into the ropes and made a cartoon facial expression after Velvet hit her with double knee strikes. She sold in a cartoon way on her back as she absorbed a Velvet standing moonsault and didn’t have the wherewithal to move, but then immediately recovered and rolled out of the ring afterward so she could make a cartoon face for the hard camera. Velvet then dove out of the ring at Bunny and almost died. Bunny didn’t catch her right and she could’ve broken her neck. Velvet was fine, but she almost wasn’t.

Back in the ring, Bunny continued to make cartoon faces. Velvet kicked away at her in the corner and then did the splits as she shoved her boot into her neck. Bunny knocked Velvet off balance on the top rope and kicked her to the floor. Blade trash-talked her after she landed. Bunny played to the ringside handheld camera before going after Velvet. They cut to a partial split-screen break. [c/ss]

Velvet made a comeback when they came back from the break. Blade gave Bunny brass knux as KiLynn and Swole distracted the ref. She swung and missed. Velvet landed a spinning hook kick for the win. Velvet danced afterward.

WINNER: Velvet in 7:00.

(Keller’s Analysis: It’s not often a wrestling performance is so bad it makes me irrationally angry, but Bunny’s performance in this match did it. Her selling was awful, her constant search for a camera to mug for with cartoon faces was unprofessional, and that spot at ringside was scary as shit.)

-Dark Order talked backstage. John Silver hammed it up as he reveled he was given a TNT Title shot, but since he’s not medically cleared, he’s giving the shot to Evil Uno. Uno was happy.

(Keller’s Analysis: This just dumbs down AEW so much. Why is Silver within 10 miles of a title match, and why is he able to just gift it to someone else. This stretch of Dynamite is reminding me of the awful first pre-show they did before Double or Nothing two years ago. Calling it amateur hour would be an insult to amateurs.)

-Miro stood backstage and thanked God for his power. He also gave a shout-out to his wife (f/k/a Lana) “for being hot.” He laughed at Uno getting a title match against him. He said he is going to use his match with Uno as a teachable moment for the rest of the locker room. He said you don’t come after someone like him because you think you can win, you only come after someone like him if you know you can survive.

(Keller’s Analysis: Miro is going to be cheered wildly by fans, so the sooner AEW realizes that and doesn’t fight it, the better. He should be built up as a top level babyface to challenge Omega.)

-Excalibur plugged a special Saturday night edition of Dynamite in three weeks, June 26 at 8 p.m. ET, featuring Omega vs. Jungle Boy. He then plugged Miro vs. Evil Uno on next Friday’s episode, plus Young Bucks & Brandon Cutler vs. Pac & Penta & Kingston and Page & Dark Order’s 10 vs. Brian Cage & Powerhouse Hobbs.

-Ross hyped that the first-ever bull rope match in AEW history was next.

-Dustin’s ring entrance took place.

(Keller’s Analysis: I get putting a weak main event on Dynamite because it’s practically the middle of the night with the late start, but they did nothing to build this up throughout the show. Dustin can cut a hell of a promo, plus what’s the backstory? Calling this the main event diminishes the words “main event” when they come out of AEW announcers’ mouths.) [c]

(5) DUSTIN RHODES vs. NICK COMOROTO (w/Aaron Solow) – Bullrope match

Dustin met Comoroto on the ramp. They fought at ringside. Comoroto pressed and threw Dustin over the top rope into the ring. The ref then attached the rope to their wrists. They brawled into the area at ringside where prelim wrestlers hang out. El Fuego del Sol jumped onto Comoroto’s back. Excalibur said it’s all legal. Ross did his best not to say this was as ugly as a bowling shoe, but I know he was thinking it. They cut to a split-screen break a few minutes in. [c/ss]

Comoroto was bleeding from the forehead as he took it to Dustin in the ring. Comoroto did one of those inexcusably lazy half-shoves of Dustin which sent Dustin flying into the ropes for a rebound into a shot to the gut with a bell. Back from the break, Solow set up a table at ringside. Comoroto set up a slam off the ring apron, but Dustin blocked it and knocked Comoroto to the floor. Comoroto ducked a Dustin kick from the ring apron and powerbombed Dustin through a table at ringside. Colton Gunn stopped Solow from interfering some more.

Dustin landed his Final Reckoning finisher, but Comoroto kicked out at one. Dustin hit a flying bulldog off the second rope and then hog-tied Comoroto for the win. Ross called it “bowling shoe ugly.” (There it was! I knew it.)

WINNER: Dustin in 11:00.

(Keller’s Analysis: This reminded me of many indy shows I’ve been to over the years with the veteran star being brought in to help sell tickets to locals who wrestles the main event against a local green guy, trying to carry him to decent match. They worked hard, sure, but this match needed more build-up if it was going to happen, as it didn’t reach the threshold needed to be called a TV main event in a major company. Even Ross felt the need to acknowledge the clunkiness of it all.)

FINAL THOUGHTS: That second hour was one of the worst hours of Dynamite in history. A lot of bad early tendencies showed up that for the better part of a year have been kept off of Dynamite. It just felt like a bad episode of WCW Thunder with the B-team and bad ideas and sloppy wrestling and corny ham-it-up performances. Yuck. And while the first hour had some decent moments, this was as skippable a show as AEW has put on in ages. Not even the Andrade debut saved it. I wasn’t crazy about it because Andrade deserved something better than Vickie falling back on her tired mid-card “excuse me” routine to introduce him. Andrade had a good look, but he still seems so unsure of himself on the mic getting out any English, and it takes away from his act.