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KELLER’S WWE RAW REPORT
SEPTEMBER 6 2021
AIRED ON USA NETWORK
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves
-They opened with soundbites with New Day, Viking Raiders, the Lucha House Party, T-Bar & Mace, Jinder Mahal & Veer, Mustafa Ali & Mansoor, and A.J. Styles & Omos. Ali told Mansoor, “All you have to do is follow my lead and do what it takes.”
-They went live to the arena as Jimmy Smith introduced the show. He said everyone has their sights set on the belts held by RKBro.
-Randy Orton’s theme played and he walked out with Riddle on a scooter next to him. They replayed clips of last week’s match with Bobby Lashley & MVP. Then live in the ring, Orton said Lashley & MVP failed miserably, and that’s because Lashley “is nothing more than a greedy son of a bitch.” He said he and Riddle are going to look at the seven tag teams left on Raw and see who deserves to be next in line to be beaten by them. Riddle said tonight will be sick. He went on about the various tag teams.
MVP & Lashley came out and told Riddle to shut up. Lashley said he and MVP are entering the tournament tonight and they’ll win and then become double champions. New Day interrupted on the stage. Kofi Kingston called Lashley “Bob” and said if they want to be entered in the turmoil match, they better go talk to Sonya Deville and Adam Pearce. Xavier Woods bragged about “beating Bobby Lashley.” (What a lame “win” to brag about with a straight face.) Graves said with New Day entering first, the odds are really stacked against them.
(1) TAG TEAM TURMOIL
The New Day beat The Viking Raiders with a small package.
The New Day beat Jinder Mahal & Veer.
The New Day beat Lucha House Party.
Graves noted that New Day had been wrestling 27 minutes at this point and their lungs must be burning.
The New Day beat Mace & T-Barr with a roll-up. After the match, Mace & T-Bar attacked New Day.
Mustafa Ali & Mansoor came out, but Mace & T-Bar beat them up at ringside. [c]
After the break, Deville and Pearce said they will not the match end this way. Deville said they’re going to give those two teams time to regroup and they will restart the match between then later. Graves then announced that Lashley & MVP have been added. Four teams remain, so the winner of Ali & Mansoor vs. New Day will face MVP & Lashley or Styles & Omos later.
(2) DREW MCINTYRE vs. SHEAMUS
They cut to a break a few minutes in. [c]
Drew landed White Noise on Sheamus for a two count. Drew yanked off Sheamus’s protective mask, then went for a Claymore. Sheamus ducked and rolled up Drew with a yank of the tights for the win.
WINNER: Sheamus in 15:00.
-Sheamus offered a truce and a handshake. Drew swung the mask into Sheamus’s face and then set up a Claymore. Saxton said Drew wasn’t handling the loss well. He hit the Claymore after the 3-2-1 countdown.
-Afterward, Damian Priest said that was a hell of a fight and he enjoyed every second of it. He said he will expect nothing less from Sheamus at Extreme Rules, but he will still walk away U.S. Champion.
-Sarah Schreiber interviewed Nikki A.S.H and Rhea Ripley, asking what they share in common. Nikki said not much, but they’re working on it “and getting there, probably, I think.” Ripley said if this works and they win, maybe they’ll have some gold coming their soon. Nikki nudged Ripley and Ripley took a deep breath and bashfully began their new catchphrase: “Maybe it’s time to unleash…” And Nikki jumped in and yelled, “Super Brutality!” Ripley looked half into it, half embarrassed. Then they made their ring entrance. [c]
-Sarah Schreiber interviewed Charlotte Flair who cut a promo about facing Nia Jax later with the title on the line.
-Graves said Charlotte’s throne is under siege.
(3) NIKKI A.H.S. & RHEA RIPLEY vs. NATALYA & TAMINA
They cut to an early break. [c]
Natalya attempted a Sharpshooter on Nikki, but Nikki had just tagged in Ripley. Ripley gave her a Rip Tide for the win.
WINNERS: Nikki & Ripley in 10:00.
-Moist TV: John Morrison interviewed Karrion Kross. Morrison had an inflatable flotation animal with him. He asked Kross what makes him tick. Kross said it’s a real honor to be on his show. He said he is a person who wants to make people’s worst dreams a reality. Morrison asked what he plans to do next. “Well, John, I plan on making you suffer.” Morrison said if you threaten Johnny Drip Drip, you end up getting moistened up by a Drip Stick. Morrison asked if he’s planning to go after a title or eviscerate Styles or Sheamus. Kross said they all sound like great ideas and he’ll do all of them “right after I eliminate you out of existence.” Morrison said he’s been in the ring with Undertaker, Kane, and DX. (“The cool members,” he added. Funny.). Kross said he asked for answers, and he’ll get them in the ring when he teaches him to fall and pray. [c]
(4) KARRION KROSS vs. JOHN MORRISON
Kross beat up Morrison early. Morrison sprayed him with the Drip Stick. Kross looked upset, then kicked Morrison in the face and flipped him over the ringpost to the floor. He then put Morrison to sleep with the Kross Jacket.
WINNER: Kross in 2:00.
-Schreiber interviewed Jax. She said Charlotte freaked out last week because no one has overpowered her before like she did. She said she splattered her. She said she will finish what she started last week and walk out as the Raw Champion. [c]
(5) CHARLOTTE FLAIR vs. NIA JAX – Raw Title match
As the bell rang, Baszler jumped onto the ring apron and said she’s not sure her partner has what it takes to beat her twice in a row. She asked whether her partner will become a champion or will she choke. Jax sneered. Charlotte jumped Jax from behind. They wrestled against the ropes. The ref got between them and told them to get off the ropes. Smith said they’re starting off where they left off last week. Charlotte and Jax exchanged some words. Charlotte asked if she thinks pulling her hair makes her tough. Jax soft-slapped her face. Charlotte pulled away, rolled to the floor, and did a crotch chop. “You can kiss my ass,” Charlotte said. She walked over and picked up her belt. Baszler tried to block her. Charlotte told her to get out of her face. Jax reached over the top rope and yanked her into the ring.
Charlotte came back and scored a near fall on a roll-up. Graves said Charlotte is usually ice cold and calculated, but she seems emotional and off her game. He wondered if it would make her more dangerous. Charlotte went for a figure-four, but Jax yanked her off and slammed her onto the mat on the back of her head. Charlotte leaped off the top rope with a moonsault onto Jax at ringside. Back in the ring, Jax blocked a sunset flip and then headbutted Charlotte into the corner. She splashed Charlotte into the corner, then lifted her onto the top rope. Baszler jumped onto the ring apron. Jax asked if she was serious and to “get out of here.” Charlotte then surprised her with a Natural Selection off the top rope for the win. Baszler smiled. Saxton said he can’t believe what Baszler just did. Graves asked why she’d do that.
WINNER: Charlotte in 9:00 to retain the Raw Title.
-As Charlotte celebrated, Alexa Bliss appeared on the big screen and said she and Lilly invite her to join them on the playground. Alexa said Lilly wants to try on Charlotte’s robe. Charlotte said it’s cute that Lilly is a fan. She said she’s not into cute or her mind games. She said she’s definitely not coming to the playground. Bliss said if she won’t come to them, they will bring the playground to her. Suddenly the lights flickered and then Bliss showed up in the ring behind Charlotte with Lilly in hand. Charlotte turned and saw Bliss standing there and then took a step back. Charlotte asked what she wants from her. Bliss pointed at the title belt. Charlotte said she can have a title match because the ring is her playground, not Bliss’s.
-Highlights aired of last week’s shenanigans with Reggie and the ice cream truck.
-Reggie made his way to the ring for a 24/7 Title defense. [c]
(6) REGGIE vs. AKIRA TOZAWA – 24/7 Title match
WINNER: Reggie in a few seconds to retain the 24/7 Title.
-After the match, R-Truth went after Reggie. Reggie avoided him. Then Cedric Alexander went after him, and Humberto Carrillo. Reggie avoided both and then flipped onto a crowd of wrestler. Drake Maverick showed up on the stage. Truth asked what he was doing there and said his timing is bad. Graves said Drake was “synonymous with the 24/7 Title several years back.”
-Kevin Patrick interviewed Doudrop backstage. She challenged Eva Marie to a rematch. She said the Eva-lution turned out to be nothing more than the Eva-delusion. She said it’s time for a new era, the Doudrop-olution.
-New Day limped their way to the ring to continue Tag Team Turmoil. [c]
(7) TAG TEAM TURMOIL – Continued from Earlier
The New Day beat Ali & Mansoor: Mansoor backed off when Xavier was screaming in pain and holding his back. Ali was upset and tagged in and tried to go after Xavier. Xavier headbutted him in the chest, then tagged in Kofi. Kofi landed a crossbody, and then gave Mansoor a kneelift. Ali superkicked Kofi as he attempted Trouble in Paradise. Ali then went for a 450 splash, but Kofi moved and then hit Trouble in Paradise. Woods then leaped off the top rope with a flying elbow on Ali for the win.
Styles & Omos came out for the next phase. [c]
Styles & Omos beat The New Day: Omos broke up a Kofi cover on Styles. When Xavier entered, Omos easily fended him off and tossed him out of the ring. Styles then gave Kofi a Styles Clash for the win. Smith said, “Finally, the New Day eliminated.” (Again, this is where Smith’s use of language is just below where it ought to be. Saying “finally” is just a bad a word choice there. I know what he’s trying to say, but there are better words there. Use of “finally” there implied it was inevitable and welcome, and that’s not the story WWE wanted told at all.)
MVP & Lashley beat Styles & Omos: The Miami crowd chanted “MVP!” Lashley faced Styles at the start. Omos tagged in against Lashley, and that got a rise out of the crowd. Lashley flexed. Omos flexed back. Omos lifted his arms, then brought them down so Lashley could lock up for a test of strength. They battled, but Omos out-muscled Lashley, so he began kicking Omos. Lashley tried to suplex Omos, but Omos countered and lifted Lashley for a suplex and then dropped him forward onto the mat. Omos kicked Lashley to ringside. Lashley stood and had some words face-to-face with Orton. Styles leaped off the announce desk onto both Orton and Lashley. Riddle yelled at Styles. Omos then threw Riddle into the ringside barricade. Styles threw Lashley into the ring. MVP ran over and yanked Styles out of the ring. Styles fought back and gave MVP an enzuigiri. Omos then tossed Riddle over the announce desk. Styles then went for a Phenomenal Forearm on Lashley, but Lashley ducked and immediately speared Styles to win.
WINNERS: Lashley & MVP to earn a Raw Tag Team Title match next week on Raw.
-Omos came up behind a celebrating Lashley and head-vice slammed him. As soon as Lashley stood, Orton entered the ring and delivered an RKO. The show ended with Orton’s music playing.