“MIZ & MRS.” – EPISODE 12
MAY 15, 2019
AIRED ON USA NETWORK
The show opens with Maryse squeezing in exercise around child care. Miz shows her a “butt” exercise with a resistance. We move on to Marjo announcing that the toilet is plugged up with sh–. She plunges the toilet, Miz takes a picture, a chase ensues. At least these people have a sense of humor (…you may be thinking if you’re me and often “WTF” when watching “Total Bellas”). Moving along, Miz has to learn how to throw a pitch, his dad is there to do what dad’s do, which is offer criticism. Meanwhile, Maryse and Marjo are taking pics with the phone. Anyway, Monroe has an Instagram… and more followers than Marjo. To be fair, Maryse reposts the stuff she posts on the Monroe account to her own account. Marjo then does an improvised photo shoot by their pool. Miz and Dolph Ziggler then stand around and look at Marjo’s Instagram account. Miz tells Dolph to stop liking Marjo’s posts.
Mike is at the Cleveland Indians game to throw out the first pitch. He walks en route to the stadium with a group of people identified as “Mike’s friends.” I have no idea who they are, but they’re critiquing his outfit. George (Miz’s dad; we know his name by now, right?) pulls Miz aside to tell him “I love you and I’m proud of you” in the most wooden tone of voice possible. Yes, it’s awkward funny. Miz throws the pitch. Maryse and Marjo are watching on TV, Marjo is not impressed with Miz’s pitch. Marjo made an Instagram post making fun of Miz’s pitch. Miz wants her to take the post down. “This is so childish,” Maryse correctly surmises the situation.
Moving on, Maryse, Marjo, and Miz’s mom (Barbara) are doing aerobics – 1980s style – with leotards, leggings, and sweatbands. Mike dresses up in an outfit that matches Maryse’s and they jazzercise together. Moving along, evidently Dolph Ziggler has slid into Marjo’s DMs. Mike is weirded out about this. He wants Dolph to stop. Moving along, Mike has learned that a little hemorrhoid cream under the eyes and a face mask will do wonders for your travel weary skin. He adds some cucumber slices over his eyes and sits on the couch… Marjo takes a picture of this. “Marjo! Erase that! You don’t put that on Instagram!” Ah, first-world problems.
Maryse returns in a mixed tag match with Miz at “Hell in a Cell.” They face Daniel Bryan and Brie Bella. Anyway, the match took place five months after Monroe was born. Maryse wins the match by pinning Brie Bella. She cheated, but whatever. Moving along, Miz has ordered a Halloween prop of a scary butler to scare Marjo. The animatronic butler speaks French.
Miz sets up the animatronic butler in Marjo’s room. He turns it on as she sleeps. She leaps out of bed screaming and runs out of the room. I believe this was recorded on a phone. “It was so worth it,” says Miz. Marjo then feigns that she’s fallen and rightfully scares the crap out of Miz and Maryse. “That’s not even funny, that’s mean!” says Miz as the show concludes.