NWA HITS & MISSES 1/7: Tim Storm’s opening promo, Aldis vs. Ricky Starks in TV Title tournament, Colt Cabana and Ken Anderson, Thunder Rosa vs. ODB, Shooter Stevens & Question Mark, Rock & Roll Express Hotline

By J.R. Harris, PWTorch contributor

Question Mark and Shooter Stevens on NWA Power

SPOTLIGHTED PODCAST ALERT (YOUR ARTICLE BEGINS A FEW INCHES DOWN)...

OPENING MONTAGE – HIT: This continued to drive the Tim Storm-Nick Aldis feud by creating a clear picture of a tale of two Aldises: Is he the overconfident National Treasure or the weak champ afraid to fight and needs his lackeys? Either way, I like the whole thing.

Oh, and as we enter the arena, there’s a person dressed as Undertaker c. 1992 with the ROH World Title. Remember when the NWA World Title was a dead brand? Maybe that’s why Undertaker is holding the ROH belt. The bell definitely tolled for that company.

TIM STORM W/ GALLI – HIT: Tim Storm is draped up and dripped out today in a lovely suit with paisley tie and says it’s an honor to carry any NWA Title, especially the TV Title as it represents being a workhorse in the company. Thanks to this segment, we also find out more about the structure of the tournament. By the end of next week, we’ll have six NWA roster members moving on to the final eight but that creates an imbalance, so they’ll have two spots for NWA legends. Interesting development but a good one because if you’re the NWA, the one thing that keeps people over 35 like myself coming back is leaning on the past while creating a new legacy. Timmy Storm babyfaces so well in this segment by apologizing to the fans for Nick Aldis being a coward (though he wouldn’t say it because of respect for the NWA World Title) and that match not happening last week, and now we’ve got a problem; here comes Kamille!

In all her scene-stealing glory, Kamille holds the mic aggressively in Tim’s face as our babyface hero asks essentially if Nick Aldis is her man and what kinda top guy doesn’t even show up for main events?! And he’s rewarded with a heavy slap, smirk, slight laugh, and she walks off. Silent Kamille is the primetime television, y’all.

TV DRAWING, DAWSONS, MURDOCH W/ MARQUEZ & ANASTASIA – NEUTRAL: Come on, y’all, it’s a little too convenient to always just have the very people being put in matches at the podium, but I’ll let this slide since apparently only four names were in the bowl and three of them were present. Next week we’ll get the Dawsons against each other and Murdoch vs. Latimer.

Early predictions? Time limit draw between the Dawsons, Trevor Murdoch moves on.

ZICKY DICE VS. CALEB KONLEY, TV TITLE TOURNAMENT – HIT: Our Zack-Morris-Gone-Off-The-Rails now wears a fanny pack to the ring! Oh, and his face is on the front of his tights, but sadly, his brown beard extends to the taint part of his trunks and looks like he soiled himself. Oh, Zicky.

This was a pretty decent match as it showed how capable Caleb Konley is with his quickness, athleticism, and good looking working punches while Zicky relied on the classic heel tropes like backing off while pleading with both hands up and rolling out of the ring for a breather and separation. Caleb dominated most of the match as he had the majority of offense in the first three minutes and last two minutes, with Zicky getting a decent minute in the middle, but in the end, a missed moonsault from Konley (our first of the night) led to Snake-Rattle-and-Roll and Dice, as predicted and should have, goes over. Good match, nice pace, good highlighting of Konley but right choice in Zicky.

SHOOTER STEVENS AND QUESTION MARK W/ GALLI – MILD HIT: I was close to calling this a Miss because, as much as I love the ringside chats, I don’t think this works so well for an act like Stevens and Question Mark. I think they need to be up at the podium where they can be more animated (yes, I just said I needed a more animated Aron Stevens) and use their body language as an accessory to their words.
I won’t waste many lines on this. Stevens helped emigrate Question Mark to the U.S. as a thank you for being taught Mongrovian KAHRAHTAY and also began dressing Mark in his robe and towel. At the end of the day, they want all the belts because Shooter believes they deserve all the belts, but when confronted about actually defending his title, Stevens cuts the interview short. It’s fine. We heard this stuff last week, but we got KAHRAHTAY twice from Question Mark and we got to see him in Sandow’s old gimmick. I think that’s worth a mild hit.

THUNDER ROSA VS. ODB – HIT: Allysin Kay, our women’s champion, is on commentary, but I didn’t actually catch a lot of commentary this show, so forgive me. I also noticed that Zicky Dice and ODB are the same person representing different genders. Interesting.

The women’s division has had some clunky matches, but this worked for me. It was a story of size as Rosa always sold ODB’s strikes heavier than ODB sold Rosa’s, for obvious reasons. The crowd was hot for this match, and they should have been as it was one of the better matches for this division. Thunder Rosa popped the crowd a few times, but not with fantastic moves or an aerial assault, but just working a good style and giving as good as she was getting. There was a spot where Rosa dropped ODB on the second rope after a drop toe hold and then damn near flew out the ring with a running Bronco Buster onto the back of her head. She popped the crowd another time with a really great shotgun dropkick and it was to the point where we got dueling chants of “Let’s go, Rosa!” and “O-D-B!” And let me tell you, for a crowd of 150-200, when they’re hot, they’re very loud. The match ends with Thunder Rosa countering a TKO with a backstabber and then the double stomp to the back from the top rope and the audience gave Rosa a standing ovation. She’s going to be a huuuuuuge babyface, but we know this, it’s just telling the story to get there.

ROCK & ROLL EXPRESS HOTLINE – HIT?: “Trouble with your baby mama?” “Trouble with an ex?” “Call the Rock and Roll Express hotline at 1-1-800-ROCK-ROLL!”

No freaking idea why this was a thing outside of they just do sh– to do it and sometimes it works (Tony Falk’s Waffles and Tire Irons) and sometimes it doesn’t (Austin Idol’s date rape). And then there’s this and I have no idea what it is but it made me smile seeing Ricky Morton bring up a caller’s childhood and Robert Gibson somehow looking at every camera in the room at the same time. Maybe it just needed another joke to really be a hit without a question mark.

NICK ALDIS W/ GALLI – HIT: Super professional Nick Aldis skipped out on the suit and dressed in his tacky Strictly Business tracksuit, but I like the juxtaposition from last week where it was Tim Storm dressed in wrestling gear and Nick in a suit and now the reverse. Everything they do seems to be to counterbalance the other. Aldis has some real heat and it’s beautiful, and he owes a lot of it to how well Tim has babyfaced but Aldis isn’t a shrinking violet here.

Aldis called himself the Tyler Perry of NWA because he makes stars and he’s going to give Ricky Starks a 6:05 Time Limit Exhibition to help make him a star and because people seem to think Aldis can’t get the job done in six minutes, but au contraire! The ONLY job Aldis doesn’t do in six minutes involves Mickie James!

He reiterated Kamille is no longer insurance but a full member of Strictly Business; the actions of Strictly Business don’t need to be justified, but Tim Storm’s do because he’s a relic always sticking his nose in the champ’s business; also, Ricky Morton is a dang relic who needs to butt out of champ business, too! Aldis also has this really great face where it’s part snickering Seth Rollins but without being annoying. Does that make sense? Regardless, his heel persona is on fire right now.

NICK ALDIS VS. RICKY STARKS, 6:05 TIME LIMIT EXHIBITION – HUGE HIT: The second I knew this was a time limit match, I figured this would be a time limit draw because that’s how you get Ricky Starks over without damaging either Aldis or Starks. There was some early showboating from the champ as he hit a cartwheel over the prone Starks and he climbed the turnbuckle for a hammock pose. Ricky Starks returned the favor after a dropkick by lying on his side and relaxing in front of the champ! Shortly after, Aldis performed a classic vertical suplex that made the Davey Boy fan in me pop, God save the dang queen, I say!

Around the three minute mark, the champ significantly slows the pace down and even had time for a headlock that would make Kevin Owens and Randy Orton jealous. A headlock even for six seconds in a six minute match is quite significant. With two minutes remaining, Starks picked the pace back up until he almost killed himself with a suicide dive that seemed to be a valid and honest suicide attempt. I’m on Wade’s side, y’all. Enough diving to the outside. It’s been done to near death.

And now, let’s talk the denouement! Starks misses a second rope moonsault (our second of the night), Aldis moved but Ricky landed on his feet but sold a buckled knee. Aldis shot in for a cloverleaf but Starks countered with a small package for two. Starks then goes for his facebuster, but Aldis countered while bent over for the cloverleaf with a minute remaining. After fighting the pain of the hold and scratching for the rope, time expires! The last minute and a half was really good and quite seamless as fast as it moved.
Ricky Morton, the evergreen babyface, comes out and applauds Ricky Starks and gets the fans to behind him and his request for five more minutes. How does the champ reply? “…No.” “You’re telling me, you won’t give this man five more minutes?!” “…No.” LOL, never change, champ. So ultimately, Robby decides well then hell give himself five minutes instead, to which the champ says… NO. He then grabbed his belt and exits the studio!

This was all great. It was a predictable but great story told in the match. It got Ricky over as an energetic babyface who just needs a chance. It got Nick Aldis more heat. It continues to lay ground for the Morton-Aldis beef. Everything was just firing on all cylinders for this segment. And thank goodness we didn’t have to see Ricky wrestle five minutes.

MAIN EVENT – DRAKE & COWBOY VS. CABANA & ANDERSON VS. WILD CARDS – NEUTRAL: I’m giving this match a solidly neutral rating because the wrestling was fine, the twist was fine, the ending was fine, the rift between Cabana and Anderson was fine, everything was just fine. But nothing was enough to put it into hit category.

The Wild Cards were introduced but no-showed, I guess that’s a Strictly Business thing, no-showing matches. Colt and Eli showed their weird respect for each other with a light fist bump before the match and we got some decent chain wrestling to start. Stu Bennett, a wunderkind to color commentary, highlighted something we touch upon on the PWTorch VIP-exclusive “Ten Pounds of Talk” podcast nearly every week – and that’s Colt Cabana is such an entertainer (read: goofball) that people forget how athletic (read: good at wrestling) he really is. That’s a breadcrumb, people. We know we’re getting to a Drake-Cabana big match and last week we laid breadcrumbs from Cabana’s title winning past and now this. Well done, y’all.

My favorite spot in the match was somewhere after a decent tilt-a-whirl leg scissors from Cowboy, he made the hot tag to Drake, who entered the ring, ducked a wild haymaker from Anderson, and slipped it into a beautifully crisp Russian leg sweep. The entire transition from tag to punch ducked to float around to hook arm and leg and bump was just perfectly timed. Finally, Ken Anderson was part of something that went right!

In the end, the babyfaces won after Ken Anderson yanked Storm off the apron and hobbled him, isolating Drake alone in the ring, and after Cabana’s Superman pin was kicked out, Fat Ken went and grabbed the referee and was immediately disqualified. This furthered the groundwork Eli Drake laid last week when he told Colt you can’t trust Ken, and that’s what they went for in this match. Ken blind-tagged himself in early and Colt looked quizzically at him for that. When Ken would try to heel it up in the corner and do heely dirty work, Colt shot Ken that quizzical look. When Ken got them disqualified, Colt accosted Ken, even yelling to him that he’s better than that. The cameras lingered on Colt long outside the ring with Ken just barely in the background, teasing an immediate turn but good on them for not pulling that trigger so quickly.

But come on, Colt. Ken is NOT better than that. He’s not better than anything or anyone.

CLOSING SEGMENT WITH STRICTLY BUSINESS – HIT, BUT: Aldis walked out with the SB crew and said he’s got the power to giveth and taketh away – and he tooketh away Wild Cards from his match (thank goodness). He also yelled at a fan that he is god. Aldis, I’m telling y’all, best men’s champ in North America. Nicky Aldis demands to address the dinosaur in the room and calls out Ricky and Robert, and y’all, they look a mess. Ricky Morton has on these awful ripped dad jeans but underneath the rips is more denim! They’re like fake rips! And honestly, maybe that’s for the better? Robert damn near stumbled into Ricky walking out and has a shirt reading “LOYALTY IS A HOAX!” and maybe that’s something I don’t know about in wrestling, but I just saw an old geezer in a QAnon looking shirt. Not a great visual.

After Aldis tells a presumable “fat boy” to shut up in the crowd, he issues a proposition to Morton where Team Aldis will fight Team Morton next week, and if Team Morton wins, then Ricky gets a title shot. Morton pats his own self on the back as the quintessential babyface telling us he never was a world champ because he didn’t politick and rather he fought for the boys in the back. Uh, sure. That’s why, Ricky.
We’re not over, though! There’s a twist! Neither Aldis nor Morton will be in the match! Morton will have Gibson and two other jabronies and Aldis will call on Wild Cards (yuck) and a mystery third person that will be announced ne… oh not next week? Oh, right now? Like now, now?! Sirens go off and “HOLLER IF YA HEAR ME!” plays on television but the crowd barely responds as if zero music played in studio. That’s right, y’all, another dinosaur enters in Scotty Steiner! Look at him walk down the stairs, risking hip and limb! So gingerly! What kind of crap is this?! Sure, Steiner is a name and local to Georgia now, but who wants a Scott Steiner match in 2020?! This was going to be a surefire hit, BUT then the reveal.

OVERALL – HITTISH: Three good to really good shows in a row for NWA Power! Season two is really hitting its stride. Loved seeing the crowd really get behind Thunder Rosa because I’ve been a fan for a long time now. I liked that they’re finding ways to keep PPV opponents apart right now while not distracting from those stories. We don’t need Tim and Nick in each other’s faces every week, and having Nick engaged with Morton as a side project works. We already know Eli Drake and Colt Cabana will be in a program, but it’s good to have Cabana entertained with this possible Ken Anderson thing. The NWA is really good at having characters locked into long term programs, but having intermittent stories at the same time. If only the Shooter Stevens wasn’t ringside or the reveal wasn’t Scott Steiner, this episode would be firmly hit.


CATCH UP… NWA HITS & MISSES 12/30: Hit after Hit after Hit for Tim Storm vs. Nick Aldis, Aron Stevens vs. Trevor Murdoch, Girlll Power promo, Powerrr Surge

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